I think I’d forgotten fatigue was a main component of fibromyalgia. The pain can be so all-consuming at times. Do I take medication or try to manage it through other techniques like meditation? What time is my physical therapy appointment? Am I sitting with correct posture, or is this going to hurt later?

Lately, the fatigue has really been getting me down.

Sunday went something like this.

9:45 am: Oh great! I woke up before 10 am without the alarm. I must really be making progress with my sleep, I’m so excited.

11:00 am: Well, I’m kind of sleepy. The couch looks really nice for a nap right now. But I’m trying to cut out daytime sleep, so I’ll avoid it.

12:00 noon: Okay, maybe reading will distract me from wanting to sleep.

1:00 pm: Right-o, I have to get ready for an appointment. That should keep me occupied.

2:00-4:00 pm: Appointment happening. My eyes are a little blurry towards the end, and I’m having some trouble focusing. Is this fibro fog, fatigue, or something “normal”?

5:00 pm: Food sounds really good right now. I’ll do that.

6:00 pm: Back at the house. What to do?

6:05 pm: Oops, I sat with my neck turned to the left while I was listening to someone. Now my whole left side hurts. Ow ow ow.

6:30 pm: Shit, this really hurts. I guess I’ll take some medication.

6:45 pm: And the meds are making me drowsy. Well, I guess this is as good a reason as any to take a nap.

9:00 pm: Woke up from nap. Dammit, this is really going to throw my whole sleep cycle off.

9:30 pm: Better head towards getting sleepy – maybe read a book or something.

11:00 pm: Sucked into the internet vortex of webcomics, news articles, and random nonsense.

12:00 midnight: I should probably go to bed, but this is really interesting.

1:00 am: Is it 1:00 already? Well, I’ll head to bed in a minute.

2:000 am: Shit shit shit, I was really hoping to get my sleep cycle adjusted. I’ll brush my teeth and such.

2:30 am: In bed. Trying to fall asleep with my new relaxation CD. It seems to be helping, although mostly right now my breathing is nice and relaxed and my limbs feel heavyyyyyyyyyyyy…zzz.

And this is the saga of my day yesterday. It really feels like I’m stuck in this endless cycle of fighting with sleep. Will it be relaxing? How to coax myself to bed on time? How to wake up in the morning before it gets really late? And of course, the struggle to avoid daytime sleep.

I’ve read all of this stuff on sleep hygiene and the like, but it’s so much harder to do in practice.

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