Pausing for a moment of awareness

I’m having one of those days filled with phone calls and waiting for test results, people wanting to know things right now, and waking up later than intended.

Honestly, it’s one of those days that could drive a person insane.

So I’m taking time for a moment of mindfulness. It doesn’t have to be a 30 minute meditation, or full-on yoga session. As one of my meditation instructors once told me, just take a moment to ask, “What is happening for me right now?”

I’m noticing my hands are swollen today…noticing myself getting swept up in thought…aware of my fingers on the keys and my feet on the floor. I’m aware of taking a deep breath, and my stomach being tense.

The world is a little less chaotic now than it was a few moments ago. Nothing has been miraculously “cured,” but I don’t feel like I’m being sucked up in some interdimensional vortex of rushing.

Part of the key to this exercise is to focus on sensations of the here and now – not thinking about the 50 things you have to do before dinner, instead examining the texture of the floor, or the nature of your breath. If you have a thought or a worry, notice that you’re having a thought or a worry.

So I’d like to invite you, if you want, to ask yourself, “What is happening for me right now?“

59 Seconds

The self-help industry puts out a number of books, some more credible than others. I don’t know if anyone really believes they can think themselves thin, but books like that tend to sell. I’ve found some of them to be useful, particularly those related to meditation.

Richard Wiseman, a psychologist, has recently published a book that examines many self-help strategies in light of clinically proven psychology. For example, he considers the idea that you should “visualize a better you,” and notes that this is the exact opposite of what psychological studies have shown. Instead, Wiseman says that you should “visualize the steps to a better you” and do concrete goal setting.

He also takes the format of many self help books – “in just one minute, you can _______” – by creating a blog (and a book) called 59 seconds. These have advice you can follow in 59 seconds, and it’s all backed up by the psychological establishment.

The concept is interesting, and it’s definitely something I want to read more in depth. I haven’t read his book yet, and thus I can’t whole-heartedly recommend that you buy it. If you want to learn more about the concept, you can sample it by perusing his blog, watching some YouTube videos, and listening to a radio interview on NPR.

Saving you from the grouch fest

I’m in a grumpy mood today. I don’t want to subject you, dear reader, to my grouchy outbursts. Suffice it to say: possible stress fracture in foot in addition to the neuroma + migraine + TMJ.

Maybe a real post over the weekend? We’ll see.

Fresh food is good for the soul

There is something about eating good home cooking. It’s even better when it’s home grown. Partly, I’m sure it’s the lack of additives and other nonsense manufacturers put in processed foods. Having control of ingredients helps. There’s also something deeply psychological and just plain tasty about fresh food.

For me, food is more than just fuel. Eating is a communal activity, a time for me to spend catching up with loved ones. Cooking can be a communal activity as well, or a creative outlet. I like to savor my food, rather than microwaving a (shudder) Hot Pocket or Pop Tart on my way out the door.

Putting fresh-from-our-garden strawberries in my granola this morning? A-maz-ing.

Sorry, didn’t mean to make you drool.

I know not everyone has time/space/affinity for gardening. It can be time consuming, and it’s not exactly easy if you live in an apartment, or (worse) a basement apartment. (Hydroponics or grow lights are an option even in a basement, though not exactly energy efficient.)

I will say that I highly recommend growing fresh herbs. You can grow them in the ground, in containers on your balcony/porch/patio, on a windowsill, or under a grow light. It’s nice to just throw something extra in the pot. Sometimes, I go outside and stare at my herbs for culinary inspiration. They encourage me to cook fresh food, or even just add a little something extra to an omelet or throw some dill in a salad. I recently acquired some lemongrass, which I’m told makes excellent tea (and Thai soup).

And did I mention pesto, my go-to meal of the growing season? I made some the other day, and didn’t want to butcher my entire basil plant so early in the season, so I improvised. I grabbed whatever herbs looked good – making sure there was a good amount of basil – and used them in my go-to pesto recipe, taken from one of my favorite cookbooks, Veganomicon. This recipe is adapted from the Basil-Cilantro Pesto on page 214.

Ingredients:

• 3 cups of herbs, including Basil (examples: Cilantro, Parsley, Lemongrass, Chives, Thyme…)
• 1/3 cup sliced almonds
• 2 tbsp. lemon juice
• 2-3 cloves garlic, peeled and crushed
• 1/4 cup olive oil

Combine everything in a food processor. Pulse, scraping down the sides periodically with a rubber spatula or spoon. When the pesto is of the desired consistency (in terms of almond size, oil, etc.), EAT. (On pasta, spread on a sandwich, etc.)

This recipe is great for those with ability issues – with no chopping and dicing, it’s very easy on the hands.

Laughter is contagious

I’m having a pain day, so this post will be limited due to difficulty using the computer. As a general pick-me-up, I thought I’d share this video of a toddler with the giggles. It cheers me up even more than Cute Overload.

Ever notice how laughter is contagious?

Comic break: Calamities of Nature

I thought I’d share a strip from one of my (newest) favorite webcomics, Calamities of Nature. It’s a sharp, witty, comic filled with musings on science, religion, and bacon.

I could write about the implications of this particular strip, but I think it speaks for itself. If you want a little more background, you can check out the origins of many musical genres. (Note: If you’re having trouble reading the comic below, clicking on the image will take you to a larger version on the original site.)

Just Another Day on the Bus

Sleep and memory

There’s an intriguing video over on the NOVA scienceNOW website – a show on the U.S. Public Broadcasting Station. (Basically, it aims to provide interesting scientific information in roughly 10 minute segments.)

The episode in question has to do with sleep and memory. It covers such things as fruit fly sleep (and areas of their brains that are active when sleeping), rats who dream of mazes, and human memory. I won’t include too many spoilers, but suffice it to say that there seems to be a strong possibility that sleep is related to memory in humans. It also seems to affect learning. Think about studying for an exam before bed, and that information being reinforced overnight. Or what about those times people decide to “sleep on a problem.”

I can’t help wondering what exactly that means for people with fibromyalgia. If we don’t sleep well, does that affect our memories? Perhaps this connection between sleep and memory accounts for fibro fog. All this is, of course, my own personal speculation. It seems that other people have already thought of it. According to Arthritis Today,

One of the most popular theories about fibro fog has been that these problems are caused by sleep deprivation and/or depression, but one study [note: one] found that neither poor sleep nor depression seemed related to cognitive performance.  Brain scan studies have shown that from time to time, people with fibromyalgia do not receive enough oxygen in different parts of their brain. One possible reason is that part of their nervous system is off-kilter, causing changes in the brain’s blood vessels.

New research – though not on fibromyalgia specifically – shows that chronic pain itself may affect the brain. A technology called functional MRI found that in people with chronic pain, a front region of the brain mostly associated with emotion is constantly active. The affected areas fail to “shut off” when they should, wearing out neurons and disturbing the balance of the brain as a whole.

Again my own speculation – sleep, pain, and the brain are such complex issues that perhaps there are multiple causes at play. I guess I’ll be researching chronic pain and the brain next.

Regardless of my own pet theories, I like keeping up to date on sleep research. I hope you enjoy the video as well – it’s about 12 minutes, and quite entertaining.

Pain and the weather

You hear references sometimes, many conjuring up images of toothless old geezers sitting on their rocking chairs, complaining about how they can tell a storms a-comin’. They can feel it in their bones.

Much has been written about possible connections between pain and weather – just do a quick google search on “pain and weather” – and there isn’t much agreement. There is some suggestion that barometric pressure, or particularly rapid changes in weather, are a strong indicator for increased pain. Still, it varies from patient to patient.

I haven’t researched this extensively lately – my main sources at this point are a 1995 N.Y. Times article and a Weather Channel article on Aches & Pains 101. Admittedly not the most reliable or exhaustive study. I would search more, except I’m recovering from a migraine that means that looking at the computer screen for too long makes me slightly queasy. Scratch that – I feel slightly queasy anyway. Of course, reading a mystery novel set in the practically tempest-filled Dartmoor, England probably didn’t help. (The book is quite good, though.)

I just started a new pain journal – more on that in another post – and have been tracking weather patterns, as well as things such as exercise, sleep, food, and of course pain.

What does today’s flare-up indicate? Inconclusive at this point.

The most I can point to is that it was an unfortunate conflation of triggers. I didn’t sleep until 3 am, and got up at noon. Spending so much time in bed hurt, and I forgot part of my previous night’s medication. It was bright and windy outside, and I had chocolate (a known migraine trigger). True, the barometric pressure changed rapidly – dropping from 29.96 inches Friday to 29.69 Saturday, then increasing today to the 30.11 range. (I use averages for simplicity.)

Is it the pressure? The chocolate? The sleep patterns? Or some nebulous interaction?

One data point amidst four days of symptom tracking doth not a pattern make. It does strengthen my commitment to keeping a pain log, to see what I might find.

Methods for organizing symptom logs

I keep searching for the perfect symptom log system. You know, that log your doctor is always encouraging you to keep – th e one that keeps track of your symptoms so that you can figure out what your triggers are. The American Chronic Pain Association describes it this way:

Many things can affect your pain. These can include stress, sleep, money worries, and even the weather. The Pain Log can help you track the everyday things that have an impact on your pain. When you understand what makes your pain worse, you can begin to work on ways to reduce or deal with your pain “triggers.” The more you know about how your body reacts, the more you can be in control. And being in better control can help you be less afraid and better able to manage your pain. We encourage you to fill out a chart out at the end of each day or several times a week. You also can take your “log book” to your doctor visits. It can help you talk more openly with your healthcare provider so that together you can find ways to improve your quality of life.

Note: The American Chronic Pain Association has a sample log about halfway down their Communication Tools page.

The real beauty of such symptom logs is that they offer an objective view of what impacts your treatment. It’s no longer, “I think I started feeling better once I stopped eating gluten/meat/processed foods.” You can also see whether or not you started exercising more during that time, or if dietary changes led to weight loss. Any number of factors could lead to changes in your symptoms – wouldn’t it be nice to know for sure that it was gluten before you gave up bread forever?

I wrote about my attemps at keeping a sleep journal/log awhile ago. It worked for awhile, and it soon became fairly obvious that poor sleep (and late bedtimes) contributed to my pain levels about two days later. There seemed to be kind of a lag. Not surprisingly, I also fared better if I went to sleep before midnight. I also found that being conscious of the fact that I would be writing the results of my sleep down to be an effective motivational tool: it was like having to tell the teacher that I didn’t do my homework. Or rather, telling the computer that I didn’t get up until 11:00 am. I gained many useful insights from my sleep log, and I wish I’d managed to make it a sustainable part of my daily routine.

The longest lasting and most successful symptom log I ever kept was a simple paper mood log that my psychiatrist gave me to keep track of mood symptoms. It was created by the Depression and Bipolar Support Alliance, and its genius was that it was paper, portable, and had a built-in graph so you could track when your symptoms went up and down. (To download a printable version, try going to their “Working Towards Wellness” section. There appears to be an online version as well. Note that these are both for mood disorders.) “Hmm, when I started taking medication A, I began feeling dizzy. I should call my doctor.” It also helped to have my doctor ask me for it – again the factor of telling the doctor I didn’t do my homework. I could also see that it was impacting my treatment, as it offerred a scientific and objective means of tracking the effects of new medications on my symptoms.

The down side to keeping logs and journals is that it is time consuming. Also, how do you organize it? On paper or on the computer? What software do I use? Did I do it in the morning or the evening? What about if I’m on vacation?

I’ve come to these general conclusions about symptom logs and myself:

• The more complicated it is, the less likely I am to keep it up.
• The more time-consuming it is, the less likely I am to keep it up.
• Seeing real results from my log (insights into sleep, information for my doctor) motivates me to continue.
• Having someone – the computer or a person – “keep track” of whether or not I’ve done my log motivates me to continue.
• Symptom logs help me be an active participant in my care (both self-care and care with health care providers).

I’m trying some new log systems out. When I’ve got more details, I’ll report back.

The longest lasting and most successful symptom log I ever kept was a simple paper mood log that my psychiatrist gave me to keep track of mood symptoms. It was created by the Depression and Bipolar Support Alliance, and its genius was that it was paper, portable, and had a built-in graph so you could track when your symptoms went up and down. (To download a printable version, try going to their “Working Towards Wellness” section. There appears to be an online version as well. Note that these are both for mood disorders.) “Hmm, when I started taking medication A, I began feeling dizzy. I should call my doctor.” It also helped to have my doctor ask me for it – again the factor of telling the doctor I didn’t do my homework. I could also see that it was impacting my treatment, as it offerred a scientific and objective means of tracking the effects of new medications on my symptoms.

Sick day

Taking the day off today, as I’ve got a cold. I’ll spare you the gory details, but I think it’s better if I rest.